Chicken Burgers and a Tantrum


· One Package Ground Chicken (or Turkey)

· 2 splashes Worcestershire sauce

· 2 splashes soy sauce

· 1 egg

· 1 squirt Ketchup

· 1 package onion soup mix

· 1/2 onion, diced

· Handful shredded carrots

· Handful chopped mushrooms

· Appx 1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs

· Splash olive oil

· Buns or Pita Pockets



Wash hands. This is imperative as you’re about to annihilate the ground chicken.


Rinse the chicken and put it in a bowl.


Proceed to massage, mince, pound, beat, do whatever you want to do to get out your aggression for your kid on the chicken for a minute or two...longer if necessary. Turn on Whitesnake or Metallica for added effect.


Dice the onion and add. Use onion to induce tears so it looks like you're really, really upset (which you are). If your kid shows up unexpectedly by leaving his time out spot, show him how much you have been crying because of his abhorrent behavior.


Sauté onion, carrots and mushrooms in a little olive oil until soft. Add this to chicken mixture. Squirt a little ketchup, splashes of Worcestershire and soy sauce, onion soup mix, bread crumbs and egg into the mixture. Mix more.


Repeat hand mincing if your kid is still crying. If not, let him out, order him to wash his hands and then allow him to get out his own aggression on your ground chicken as a peace offering.


Make patties out of the chicken burgers.


Spray grill with nonstick spray and grill on medium until fully cooked (appx 4-5 minutes per side) or pan fry until no longer pink in the middle.


Serve with pita pockets or hamburger buns (or wrap in lettuce if you're going no carb) and top with guacamole. These are delicious chicken burgers and as soon as you taste them everyone will kiss and make up!